Day 19

The kindness of strangers ASTOUNDS me. I was blessed with a gift yesterday. It made me cry. I won't go into what it was, because it's personal and I don't share *everything* and I'm trying to be tactful about it, but still share the love and feelings behind it. 

It was utterly unexpected, and exceedingly generous. I've never been gifted anything that valuable, nor do I think I deserve it simply for being myself, as that was why it was given. I talked with my mom about it, and she said, "They gave it to you because they thought you deserved it. It's not about what YOU think it's about what THEY think. It's how they view you, what you're doing and are able to do. It's not about you, even if you're doing it, it's about the impact you're making." I think she's right, and it persuaded me accept it instead of trying to find a way to return it. Returning it would be discourteous, and unkind. So I'll suck it up and accept it.

I have always had a hard time receiving things. While I love presents, I'm the kind of girl that is used to getting "popsicle stick presents". Things that mean something, but have little monetary value. I have a weird relationship with money, as I've been at the point where $20.00 was expensive, and meant diapers AND laundry that week. I've been at the point where $20.00 was dropped on earrings with no second thoughts too. I'm in a position where I'm financially comfortable - though dependent on my husband (he doesn't seem to mind) - but I'm still aware that finances are fickle. I prepare more for "some day" than he does. I'm more disaster prep than him, and I'm more likely to save things instead of throwing them away because I'm frugal and like to re-use things, where he's like "if you need it again, just buy it again." I've saved pots and pans that really were beyond using (I was probably poisoning us) because I didn't want to get new ones yet. "These still have life!" (They totally didn't.) 

The point is, I get how much the value of things costs. Not just the financial value, but how long you can stretch it. I am blessed with that knowledge, and so when someone gifts me something, especially something of higher monetary value, I don't know how to express my thanks. I unashamedly cried like a baby. I video'ed them and told them how grateful I was and how much I didn't expect anything of the sort.

Today I encourage you to be kind, and maybe give something if you can. It doesn't have to be something monetary. Or even to someone you know. It can be to a stranger. Give a homeless guy a conversation and ask him about himself and what he might need, or give a smile of understanding to a mom struggling with her screaming toddler in the store. Send someone a card telling them you are thinking about them. Give a random gift - even something expensive if you want to and can - to someone who inspires you. Dedicate a donation to a charity in someone's name. Volunteer somewhere. Or just call your mom/dad/brother/sister/aunt/uncle and talk to them for a while and be an ear and listen. Forgive someone. Today, we're all about giving. 

So now that my emotions are out....onto the OOTD: 

Today I have a doctors appointment, and the weather is all kinds of hinky. (humid and 70 now, more humid and 85 later, thunderstorms and 90 this evening, then 60...just smh. Ohio, get your sh*t together.)  And I decided to wear something I generally don't - WHITE PANTS. Now, I generally don't wear white pants (I'm not even sure why I own a pair TBH) because I have female issues and bleed all over all the time at random. However, I've recently got new pills (WOO!) and I seem to not be bleeding at inconvenient times. *GASPS* It's new, it's fun and I am confident enough to wear white for a short period of time. Now, I'll probably spill something all over them requiring a change later, but we'll see. LOL! 

Shirt and leggings from Torrid, earrings  (that you can't really see, they're just the tassel black ones) from Amazon, matte black shoes from Tieks. 

{Me, on my porch in front of the climbing roses, on a slightly less sunny day, wearing a navy shirt with black lace around the bottom, white text reading "Je Suis Prest" "Clan Frasier" around a picture of a stag. It's from the book/show Outlander. White leggings and matte black tieks. Tassel earrings complete the look.}

Je Suis Prest means I Am Ready for those of you who aren't Outlander fans. ;) 

I HIGHLY encourage you to read the books. They are one of the best series I've ever read, and trust me, I read A LOT. Diana Gabaldon (the author) does an astonishing amount of research for them and is a clearly gifted writer. They are very much R rated (sex, violence, swearing, war(s), rape) but are amazing, and involve time travel in a whole new light. They're fascinating and beautiful and there's even a show now on Starz (I think it's Starz) that does it justice. While it deviates from the books s, it's just as good. 

One day, my phone will focus the first time...ugh. BLOOPERS! (And pictures I chose not to use)